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08 March 2009 @ 07:22 pm
[YunJae, JaeMin] Picture Perfect (But the Picture Doesn’t Fit the Frame)  
Title: Picture Perfect (But the Picture Doesn’t Fit the Frame)
Author: Kate
Pairings: YunJae, implied JaeMin
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst, Romance
A/N: First time writing after a long time and my first time writing YunJae. It didn’t really come out the way I wanted to but this has been sitting in my hd for ages so I decided to finally finish it and get it over with lol. Inspired by a side story from Grey’s Anatomy.

Jaejoong considers himself a man living a very healthy lifestyle. He eats all the right food (though he has a weakness for spicy things and can’t stop himself when left to his own devices), exercises daily, even quit smoking a few years back (five years ago to be exact).

He loves his job at a music store, sharing his wisdom and opinions to customers, whether they ask for it or not. He’s been with the same store for five years now and he’s been employee of the month many times he lost count. He gets along with his co-workers and in good terms with his boss.

Jaejoong is also happy once he gets out from work, open arms welcoming him, a smile greeting him at the door home every day. He feels content that he found someone like Yunho. Jaejoong thanks whatever force of nature made Jung Yunho come into his life every time he sees those smiling eyes. They met five years ago when Jaejoong applied for his job at the music store and Yunho happened to be an employee there at that time. (He then since moved on and found a more high-paying job shortly after Jaejoong got hired but that didn’t stop him from asking the other man out.)

Jaejoong is grateful for Yunho and sometimes finds himself undeserving for someone like him. It hits him that maybe he just found the missing piece he’s been searching for his whole life, the one thing that would finally make him – let him – feel whole.

He lives a normal, healthy – albeit, monotonous – life.

On a bright Sunday morning, a day before Valentine’s Day, while Jaejoong was preparing breakfast, whistling nonchalantly while whipping pancake batter, a piercing pain coursed through his chest. A loud crash echoed across the kitchen as he grabs his chest, gasping, his other hand gripping the countertop as he tries to steady himself.

Yun—ho,” he tries to call out as the pain seemingly subsides but falls down on his knees as another spasm caught him off guard.

Yunho, thankfully comes almost immediately, concern etched on his face after he heard the glass breaking. His eyes go wide as he sees Jaejoong on the floor, hanging on to consciousness by a thread, his hand reaching out for him. He grabs the phone on his way to Jaejoong and dials the emergency number as he holds Jaejoong against him. He pays no attention to the shards of glass next to him, not noticing – not caring – that some are sticking through his pants and against his skin. He ignores the sting and concentrates on providing all the emergency operator needs because dammit, they need to get here as fast as they can.

Jaejoong can feel Yunho rocking him gently, whispering encouraging words against his ear – stay strong, stay with me. The throbbing dulls for a moment and he grabs the chance to squeeze Yunho’s hand in reassurance. Yunho holds him tighter against him and Jaejoong succumbs, letting his eyes close and fall headfirst into oblivion.

When he wakes up, he sees the (all too) familiar white walls of the hospital room. Jaejoong looks around and thinks, ‘No, not again.’

“Jaejoong, you’re awake.” Relief can be heard all over Yunho’s voice as he stands up from his seat at the corner of the room, rubbing the sleep off his eyes. Jaejoong hears the tenderness and concern in Yunho’s voice, the guilt inside him, threatening to spill over the edges makes Jaejoong want to vomit.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers. I’m so sorry.

Yunho smiles at him and reaches out to squeeze his hand.

“You better be sorry, idiot. You scared the hell out of me.”

Jaejoong smiles weakly and reaches out for Yunho’s hand. “It’s nothing serious. Maybe I should cut back on the Tabasco and jalapeno sauces, huh?”
“That’s what you say every time.”

Jaejoong stiffens slightly at the word ‘every time’, and he thinks ‘He remembers. He knows.’ He looks up at Yunho’s face, open, smiling, loving, and Jaejoong half-wishes he could’ve suffered more.

A soft knock shakes Jaejoong out of his reverie and sees his doctor enter his room. Yunho greets him and moves away from the bed, letting the doctor take his place beside Jaejoong. The other man momentarily panics as Yunho’s grip slowly eases from his hand but feels the soft squeeze of reassurance from him.

Dr. Yoon smiles at Jaejoong and asks all the mundane questions doctors ask to their patients every time they check up on them, and Jaejoong plays the perfect patient.

“Well, glad to know everything’s fine now,” the doctor says kindly before opening the record book he brought with him.

“I’m just a bit curious, Jaejoong-sshi. I hope you don’t mind me asking but there’s just something that’s been niggling in my mind ever since I looked through your record. It’s stated here that you’ve been confined in this hospital the same day last year and the year before that as well. I checked all your vitals and everything seems to be in order. I’m beginning to think that what happens to you has nothing to do with your physical state. Is there a particular event that happened around this time about three years ago that you think would trigger such an effect on you?”

Jaejoong looks up at the young doctor abruptly and he can see Yunho at the corner of his eye, standing silently beside him. He thinks he saw his breath hitch lightly but Jaejoong can’t be sure. He tries not to cry – that was the question he’s been lucky to avoid last year – and feigns innocence as much as he could.

“I… I don’t think so? I don’t remember anything significant,” he replies, his voice cracking slightly and desperately prays no one noticed.

“Aaah. It just must be a really, weird coincidence then,” Dr. Yoon says, closing his record book shut. He smiles at Jaejoong and nods at Yunho making his way to the door.

“You can leave before the day ends. Hopefully, this coincidence won’t happen again next year,” he quips before closing the door behind him.

Jaejoong lets out his breath he didn’t know he was holding, and smiles in relief, his gaze flickering over to Yunho who moves over to sit on the foot of his bed, deep in his thoughts.

“Do you remember our co-worker, Changmin, from the music store? Didn’t he disappear around this time a few years ago and the next thing we heard about him was that he got run over by a car while he was on his way home from one of his other part-time jobs?”

Jaejoong feels his heart stop as he hears the wondering tone in Yunho’s voice. Oh god oh god oh god.

“Really?” he asks nonchalantly and Jaejoong feels like dying.

Jaejoong wants to scream and let out what he’s been hiding inside all these years. He prides himself for compartmentalizing his memories and thinks he can finally let go. But every damn year, his body – his heart – betrays him and Jaejoong can’t help but remember.

He opens his mouth to speak, the words at the edge of his tongue (I love you but— I loved you first but he— I’m sorry) but Yunho looks up and smiles like nothing is wrong and he doesn’t know.

“I guess you wouldn’t remember. You weren’t really that close, right?” Yunho stands up and walks over to the door. Jaejoong just gapes at him, ready to tell him anything, everything because he’s tired of hiding from it as well.

“I’ll just go get some coffee, okay?” Yunho says and goes out the door, shutting it softly.

Jaejoong closes his eyes and lets the tears fall for the first time in three years.

He doesn’t hear Yunho’s own heart breaking on the other side.


Comments and constructive criticism would be greatly appreciated~ Thank you! ^_^
Current Mood: gratefulgrateful
紫のチャンミン: JaeMin in pariskurogoma on March 8th, 2009 01:10 pm (UTC)
i like how everything seemed to be so perfect, so normal, so boring. but it's actually not.

that even though yunjae were first, it was jaemin that left a deeper, broken impact on jaejoong that might never really go away.

ケイト: [동방신기] 재민 - in our own worldkeight_michelle on March 9th, 2009 07:34 am (UTC)
that even though yunjae were first, it was jaemin that left a deeper, broken impact on jaejoong that might never really go away.

yesss. i'm glad it seemed that way to you because that's what i was aiming for and wasn't really sure i conveyed it enough. XDDD

thank you for reading! :) ♥